I’ve had a killer cold for 3 days now; I stayed home sleeping all day on Monday. Where I have discovered the bed is killing my back. I haven’t had an uninterrupted night sleep in nearly a week now. I’m tired.
The house seems to be behind schedule. The contractor is flaky. It’s stressful. The boys aren’t doing that well in school so far. I suspect too many video games and t.v.
My job seems like an endless pit of the same recycled crap every day. We’re in the process of hiring my replacement. And I say it is VERY good timing. Because I’m running ragged. Disenchanted.
Kitten insists on getting the house painted without me. Not so much as she wants to do it all her self, or wouldn’t like my help. I’ve actually helped. I think she enjoys the distraction. She hasn’t felt well since the honeymoon. Turns out she has gallstones the size of my head. They’re stopping up everything. So the gall bladder comes out Friday.
I know she’s scared. I’m scared too … the last time I had a wife in the hospital she was near death. I don’t really want to re-live that. Most the time I feel helpless in the situation. Most of the time.. sheesh … ALL of the time.
I’ve very happy. Really…. But I feel like a bystander on occasion, watching in on someone else’s life. It’s spooky. And lonely. But not in a miserable way … I know miserable. It’s just … unknown. Unsure.
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